My Dad wasn’t always sure what to do with me. I was a typical kid who loved playing games
and anything that involved being outside.
And while I liked sports and Ice Cream.
I also liked hard rock music.
And a band called KISS was the center of that universe. While my Dad was religious he never showed
any concern with me accidentally worshipping the devil. But I still wouldn’t call him supportive of
my desire to rock. More, support by not
stopping me.
He never seemed all that interested. But then nobodies dad did. You either had super strict parents that
wouldn’t let you do anything but go to school and church or you had typical
parents who would let you scrape your knees and put a few bumps in your head
while they talked with other adults about grown up things. Most everyone I grew up with had to go to
church and we all got in trouble if we got grass stains on our church clothes. And when one of our parents took us to a KISS
concert it wasn’t for their enjoyment.
The modern Dad seems intent on making sure their kid is
raised liking the same things they did.
An AC/DC or KISS concert is something they feel their child needs to
experience before it’s too late. Too
late for what? They have to make you
watch Star Wars because it’s awesome. I
touched on this in my last blog. All of
things you got into or enjoyed from your childhood or even into your teens and
20’s. Would they have better if your Dad
were just as into it as you were? Would
you want your Dad playing the role our friends did when we were kids?
Before you answer lets ask a couple of questions. Why does the modern dad feel it necessary to
share Star Wars with his son?
Bonding? A chance to relive their
childhood? That’s probably what “they”
will tell you. But while the second is
probably more true than the first I think there is a subliminal reason
festering in the brain of the modern parent.
The myth of a loving father.
For some reason (TV) my generation seems to be the first
that felt Dad didn’t love them enough.
We wanted Mike Brady and got Archie Bunker. The world is full of 40 year old men who
promised they would be more involved in their child’s life. From cutting the umbilical cord to attending
Comic-con. They will leave work for
little league games and make sure they know how much daddy loves them. At any cost.
Which in turn has filled the world with 20 year olds who think the start
time of their shift at Target is more of a guideline. And it’s no coincidence that music has
stopped evolving because of it. We have
immersed ourselves so deep into our children’s lives they have no organic path
of finding anything new, including music, so they listen to what their parents
listen to.
Starting with Elvis there has been a sizeable shift in music
approx. every 5-7 years. By in my
analysis (I am the Commissioner after all) there hasn’t been on since
1998. Every form of popular music, pop,
country, hard rock and metal, has become more formulaic than at any time. And with streaming becoming more and more
popular it will become even less likely the next great thing will ever be
heard. Everything is heading toward
monthly fees and contracts. Soon your
toaster will need an internet connection and a signed user agreement to warm up
a bagel. And it’s this generations
fault. And therefore, their parents
fault for raising apathetic slugs who don’t want anything and are devoid of any
real inspiration. They just want their
parents to continue to pay for their smart phone.
Discovery might be the single most important part of growing
up. It’s not just about having a
favorite band or creating fond memories.
It’s what teaches us not to run in itch weed. And it’s what makes us seek out more of what we
love and less of what we hate. It’s how
we develop life skills like cognitive reasoning, time management and trouble
shooting. It makes us think and that
develops our brains. And with that it’s
the parents job, NAY! It’s their sworn
duty to allow that to happen as organic as possible. Now I’m not suggesting we go back to a time
when the father smoked cigarettes in the waiting room while mom spent 36 hours
squeezing you out (yes I am), but something closer to form of parent that
raised us.
It’s time my generation cut our Dad’s some slack. They did a better job raising us than we’re
doing with our kids. Most of us have
fond memories of our fathers and moments we bonded. Are we so narrow that we can only bond with
our kids if it involves OUR interests?
Is it really the role of a parent to be friends with their
children? Or should we walk behind them
to help when they fall? Let your kids
discover music and movies and so many other things on their own. Let them find their own Star Wars. Their own band. Let them have their own fond memories to
share when they are older. I promise
some of them will be of you. You are
their Dad. And by God once they turn 16
make em' pay for their own cell phone.
Teach em’ some fucking responsibility for fucks sake. Happy Father’s Day. Now fuck off.
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